Like Secrets Held too Long

 Like secrets held too long...

Sometimes I say too much... share too easily...

and maybe its because there are things I can never say...

Secrets that must be held... 

Sometimes I say too much... 

Sometimes even from myself...

Maybe sharing too much is a trauma response...

Maybe telling so much of my story is a way of needling to be seen...

Yet knowing I'll still hide the shame of some...

I'm learning that my stories can help another...

I'm still surprised sometimes what people share with me...

Let me hold with them...

It feels like an honor, it feels like being let into a place few are allowed...

Holding space for them to find healing...

Looking deep in their soul, and not looking away...

Maybe my longing to be really seen gives me the capacity to really see...

I am learning to soak in the moments that have me catching my breath...

The burst of love like air blown in a babies face before they're submerged under water...

Maybe its to hold in the love so it can circulate inside my body, touching all the hidden places before I let it go to share it with the universe.

1-5-22